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Saturday, July 10, 2010

'Excuse Me'

The proximity of Ozone to my house serves for two purposes; firstly I can watch any movie any time and secondly it gives me a healthy dose of exercise (the walk). Those two purposes, as you may very well tell, work very closely hand in hand. I go for a walk to Ozone, watch a movie and then walk back home. Who could ask for anything more? Ozone therefore, for me, equals exercise and entertainment rolled in one.

On my walks to and from Ozone I have observed many different things. My favourite observation however is how my sex affects the quality of my walks. I mean to say that I enjoy seeing how being females makes my walk different from being male. My favourite sub observation centers around the fact that being female and walking alone draws more attention than being male and walking alone. This is for the sole reason that girls don’t sit around outside waiting for some ‘hot candy’ to walk by. How many times have you stood outside and seen teen girls just lounging around on the streets? I cannot count the number of times I’ve been approached or called out to; ‘sister’, ‘aunty’, ‘fine girl’, ‘baby’ and my particular favourite ‘excuse me’.

You might wonder why ‘excuse me’ is my favourite and since I know you’re asking, I’ll tell you. It’s simply because it has so many connotations. This didn’t occur to me until recently but that ‘excuse me’, although is an ingredient in the mixture that makes girls ignore boys on the road, does not necessarily mean he wants to hit on you. I especially like ‘excuse me’ because it gives me a choice. Sometimes I don’t feel like ignoring some boys (not cause I’d date them or anything but I just don’t feel like) but once they say ‘baby’ or ‘sister’ I have no excuse to stop and listen. ‘Excuse me’ on the other hand gives me a choice because I can rationalise in my mind that the guy wants to ask for directions or tell me I dropped something. ‘Excuse me’ is a subtle way of saying I want to talk to you because I like the way you look while all the others are brazen ways of saying hi I just want to hit that.

If pick up phrases or words (note I didn’t say line) were men, ‘excuse me’ would be the guy who would take you to the movies, pay for your ticket and insist on buying you something from Chocolat Royale before the movie even if it means he can’t pay for the taxi home. All the other ones would be the guys who would take you to Mama Cass, complain loudly about the price of everything, unbutton his trousers before he dives into his eba and then leaves no tips and then ask you for money to grab a taxi home. Despite all that I’ve said I’m still not giving you or any other boy permission to use it. Find the rich boy way of talking to a girl for the first time and seriously, avoid pick up phrases. They send little signals to girls’ brains to run screaming for their boyfriends or close male friends, trust me I’ve been there all too many times.

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